Arms Down. No Hugging. — Unisex Hoodie (Dark Text)
Size guide
| CHEST WIDTH (inches) | LENGTH (inches) | |
| S | 20 | 27 |
| M | 21 | 28 |
| L | 23 | 29 |
| XL | 25 | 30 |
| 2XL | 26 ½ | 31 |
| CHEST WIDTH (cm) | LENGTH (cm) | |
| S | 50.8 | 68.6 |
| M | 53.3 | 71.1 |
| L | 58.4 | 73.7 |
| XL | 63.5 | 76.2 |
| 2XL | 67.3 | 78.7 |
A calm, administrative reminder that physical enthusiasm should remain strictly optional. Issued by the Department’s Personal-Space Preservation Unit for citizens who prefer boundaries kept neat, tidy, and at a respectful distance.
Disclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size.
PRODUCT DETAILS:
This premium unisex hoodie combines softness, warmth, and durability. Perfect for cold-weather fieldwork, socially selective excursions, or simply avoiding unnecessary embraces.
Who knew that the softest hoodie you'll ever own comes with such a cool design. You won't regret buying this classic streetwear piece of apparel with a convenient pouch pocket and warm hood for chilly evenings.
• 100% cotton face
• 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester
• Front pouch pocket
• Self-fabric patch on the back
• Matching flat drawstrings
• 3-panel hood
• Blank product sourced from Pakistan
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Further curiosities are catalogued in the Department archives.
Continue your Examination
What you see here is merely an isolated artefact from the Department’s ongoing research. Deeper within the archives lie a variety of peculiar designs awaiting curious minds brave enough to investigate them.